Don’t Let Anxiety Take Over Your Life

Don’t Let Anxiety Take Over Your Life

Increasing anxiety levels

Things are changing at a faster rate than they’ve ever changed before and people feel stressed out. Like they can’t keep up. When stress continues long-term it becomes anxiety. According to a recent study 18% of American adults report having an anxiety disorder.

 

Information overload

In previous generations people would get their news or information from the daily paper or the evening news. It might not have been any less anxiety creating than it is now, but it was contained. People could take a break from it.

 

Now with so many of us connected to the internet nearly all the time with phones in our pockets and laptops/tablets in our bags, the barrage of information never ceases. Not just catastrophic stories about the planet’s imminent demise, but also unending, targeted ploys for our attention. The lack of downtime leaves us feeling overwhelmed and anxious.

 

We wake up anxiety ridden and carry that burden with us through the day – feeling like we have nowhere, or no way to release it. What we don’t realize it one of the best ways to get a break from the anxiety is to break from the devices that tie us to it.

 

Too much device time takes time away from other things

All of us have become dependent on our devices. They help us keep track of our lives and our friends. They’re a source of all information all the time. They also have a way of distracting/involving us to the exclusion of other aspects of our lives, like getting outside and doing more physical pursuits.

 

We spend so much time with our devices and online pursuits we neglect chances to spend time with other people. Sometimes we may forget it, but human beings are social creatures. We need to spend time with other people to feel connected to things outside of ourselves. That means in person time. Not time clicking thumbs ups on social networks time.

 

Positive people

When we’re feeling anxious we’re pretty inward focused. By spending time with encouraging people we trust, we turn some of that inward focus outward. Listening to their words of guidance and resting in an accepting place we can focus on tangible things we can do to make positive changes in our lives. We regain some of the perspective we lose when we spend too much time focusing on things over which we have no control.

 

Give yourself reasons to feel confident

There’s a strong relationship between anxiety and confidence. When we feel more confident, we feel less anxious. Conversely when we feel more anxious we feel less confident. Do things everyday to help yourself feel confident. Cross something off your to-do list. Help someone else. Make strides towards your bigger project. Each small success is an indication of the control we actually do have over our lives. It is a blow against anxiety.

 

Reconnecting with the natural world

Sometimes we need an all-stop from technology. A full break from information. Nature is the great un-plugger. Get outside and move around. Go for a walk or a run in a natural environment Engage your senses. Notice the smells. Pay attention to the details of what you see. Touch the leaves of the trees. Immerse yourself in the moment you are in and all the positive things in it.

 

Feelings are contagious

As we said earlier, humans are social creatures. We feed off each other’s energy and feelings. So much so, that feelings and states of being are contagious. Anxiety is socially contagious. If you are around anxious people you will become more anxious. If you are around confident people your level of confidence will go up.

 

The company you keep will partially determine how you feel. If you are with people who are supportive or encouraging or positive you will become more positive yourself. To keep your own anxiety at bay, limit your time with anxious people.

Confidence Is A By-product of Success

Confidence Is A By-product of Success

Confidence wins all

No matter whether you are in the business of selling a product or service, you are a baker of delectable treats, or you are a purveyor of words in rhyming couplets, your greatest asset is confidence. Your confidence is magnetic. It is infectious. You have the ability set the tone for every interaction in your life through the sheer force of your belief.

You don’t have to be a naturally confident person to exude the confidence required for success. Confidence is a by-product of preparation. Become the best you can be in your chosen field. If you are in sales, then learn everything there is to know about your products. Get with a mentor and learn the ins and outs of sales. Become adept at reading and projecting the appropriate body language. Practice, practice, practice. Preparation creates confidence.

In the book Do Less, Achieve More best-selling author Chin-Ning Chu writes, “Before the Angel of Success arrives in your life, you should devote yourself to preparing your welcome for her. Polish your craft and strengthen your body to be fit, so that you can do your job and enjoy success when it comes. Sharpen your mind and spirit so they are ready to face challenges that accompany a visitation from the Angel of Success…If you are not ready when the angel knocks, she will flee. And who knows when she will make it back around to your door again?”

Do not fall sway to procrastination

You know the old saying don’t put off till tomorrow what you can do today? That is a cornerstone in the building of success. Create a masterplan with long term and short term goals and do not let yourself wiggle out of them. Procrastination is a voracious, self-feeding beast. Give in to it one day and it’s harder to avoid giving into it the next. Each day, tackle your most difficult, mentally consuming tasks early while you still have energy and focus and stay on task.

Make sure you set achievable goals

You are ambitious and like the Brain from Pinky and the Brain, your ultimate goal may be to take over the world.

However try as they did, Pinky and the Brain never managed to achieve their quest. If your goals are out of line with what’s possible you will get overwhelmed by the weight of them and give up before finding out whether or not you really have it in you.

 

If you want to be successful you have to create goals that are achievable. That is done by breaking the ultimate goal into smaller achievable chunks with reasonable deadlines. The success of each milestone goal fuels you to keep going forward with renewed energy and enthusiasm.

 

Believe in your potential

In a blog called 7 Steps for Creating the Life you want, Jack Canfield originator of the fabulously successful Chicken Soup for the Soul franchise puts forward the idea of the inverse paranoid. “Imagine how much easier it would be to succeed in life if you were constantly expecting the world to support you and bring you opportunity. Successful people do just that.”

 

Make the success of others an integral part of your own success

Brain Tracy has said, “Successful people are always looking for opportunities to help others. Unsuccessful people are always asking, ‘What’s in it for me?’”

 

When you help others you invariably help yourself in the process. You learn from the experience, you have reason to feel good about what you’re doing and the contributions you’re making, and that boost in self-confidence helps you stay on track with your own goals.

 

As a by-product of your good deeds you will create reciprocal loops, where others will want to go out of their way to help you.

 

There is a Chinese proverb that says, “If you always give, you will always have.” The more you give, the more you will have.

 

Make lists. Lots of lists

Keep yourself on track with to-do lists every day. Not theoretical lists you keep in your head, but actual written lists you can see and cross off as you go. Seeing list of to-do’s crossed out one after the other keeps you motivated, quells thoughts of procrastination and builds confidence.

Learn To Speak Publicly Like a Pro

Learn To Speak Publicly Like a Pro

You start to shake a little bit. Your hands are a little clammy. There’s this weird hole in your stomach that makes you feel like you haven’t eaten in days. You’re thinking it might not be too late to cancel. Except you’re already at the podium, in front of all these people. You can’t turn back now.

 

Some studies estimate that 75% of the public has some level of fear or anxiety around the thought of public speaking. Whether it’s in front of an auditorium of people, or just to a handful of coworkers, public speaking leaves people feeling queasy.

 

But it doesn’t have to be that way. To overcome your fear of public speaking try these steps.

 

Preparation

If you want to freeze and loose track of your message and stumble around your words, step up to the podium or take your place in front of a room and simply wing it. Otherwise do your homework first. Determine who your audience is. Prepare speaking points that will be of interest to them. Give them something that will teach or inspire them right off the bat to get them on your side. Or something that will make them laugh. Have a solid presentation on paper then prepare to give present it out loud.

 

Practice 

That means practice, practice, practice. Give your speech to yourself in front of the mirror. Take note of your body language and what your face is doing. Give your speech to your dog. Give your speech to a friend. Give your speech to a couple friends. Start small and work your way up to larger crowds. Practice makes the words come easier. It’ll help you remember what comes next. It’ll give you more confidence as well.

 

While you’re doing all that practicing take note of your tone. Do you sound bored? Engaged? Nervous? Learn to modulate that in front of the mirror. Remind yourself to pause between thoughts. Give your audience a chance to absorb what you’re saying.

 

Talk slowly, breathe deeply

Taking a couple deep breaths automatically relaxes you. Take a couple of grounding, reassuring breaths before you get up to speak. If you are using cue cards or a paper, write “Talk Slowly” at the top. When you get nervous, you’ll start talking quicker without realizing it. That little reminder can keep you calm and help you realize it’s okay to give yourself small moments.

 

Pick someone out in the crowd

Generally, the fear that comes with public speaking has to do with the public part. We have no trouble talking with friends at a party or over coffee. But expand that number and feel the eyes of all those people on your person and all of a sudden your mouth dries out. Many people adept at public speaking pick a single person in the crowd and focus on them. By focusing on an individual you can imagine you’re delivering your speech to an audience of one.

 

Remember fear is normal

Finally, remember that getting nervous about public speaking is normal. Ask 75% of the public at large. However, just because you are worried about speaking in public, that doesn’t mean you can’t do it well!

 

Confidence Can Be Created

Confidence Can Be Created

Are you one of those people who enjoys the full flower of confidence in yourself and your capabilities? If so then you will probably want to move on to another article. However, if you are someone who’s never quite managed to make their small seeds of confidence take root, then read on. We’ve got some tips that will nurture your confidence into bloom.

 

 

Make a list of great things that have happened recently

 

Reminding yourself of good or great things that have happened lately is a great way to awaken small buds of confidence in yourself. Those things don’t have to be huge. Anything that made you smile will do. Go over the past week. Write them all down. Focusing on the positives in your life will improve your mood overall, and make you feel happier and more confidant.

 

 

Tell a friend all the things you like about them

 

First off, it feels good to be nice. Second off, telling someone what you like about them will boost their confidence. Third off, while you’re busy looking for good in other people in your life, you’ll be better able to see the good within yourself. You will improve your own confidence by proxy!

 

Do something you’ve been putting off

 

All of us have things we’ve been putting off. Small things like replying to that email that’s been sitting in our in-box for a week. Calling our mom. Cleaning our apartment. Bigger things like starting the project waiting on the back burner. Continuing work on that project or finishing it off!

 

Things that need to be done are like a big mountain in the middle of your life. They prevent you from seeing around them to what’s on the other side. Not only that they are like a drought in our confidence field.

 

As you tackle each one you feel better about yourself and how you’re spending your time. You defy the voice in your head goading you to let things ride. You actually become a watering can for your seeds of confidence.

 

Noticing the good in your life and creating more by getting things done will sprout the buds of confidence. Keep nurturing them and you will cultivate the bloom you are after.

Let’s Talk About Confidence

Let’s Talk About Confidence

We all have great ideas. No matter what your position at the company, you may come up with something that will help everyone, but if you don’t have the confidence to speak up and share your thoughts, no one will ever find out.

It isn’t always easy to feel confident, especially if you’re in a new and unfamiliar environment. The trick is learning to believe in yourself and trust that the strength of your actions and words will inspire people no matter how you are feeling.

If your lack of confidence stems from body issues, check out these body confidence tips from ehypnosis.

An Interview That’s Lacking

An Interview That's Lacking

Just about all of us have had some good interviews and some not so good ones. If you were to dissect what went wrong at the not so good ones you’d find they were lacking certain things. We’ve compiled a list of them here.

 

Lack of confidence

Not everyone is born brimming with confidence, but every single one of us can certainly convey confidence. Sit up straight, maintain eye contact, don’t fidget, smile and don’t speak a mile a minute. You will appear confident.

 

Lack of research

If you haven’t done adequate research on the company you are applying for, how can you expect to speak intelligently about the organization or the position? Before stepping into an interview ensure you’ve Googled the company. Check them out on social media. Have a few a few facts about them that you can weave into the discussion.

 

Lack of preparation

There are certain questions that come up in just about every interview. If you think you can just wing them you are mistaken. Take the time to acquaint yourself with common interview questions then come up with thoughtful, intelligent answers

 

Lack of listening

Sometimes people get so caught up in what they want to say and how they’re going to answer the questions they expect, they don’t actually hear what the interviewer is saying. Pay close attention to the person in front of you. Ensure you are answering the question they are asking. Get into their headspace and follow their lead in terms of tone and speech pattern. If they are slow speakers, then slow down your speech. If they seem like they’re interested in elaborate, descriptive answers then provide those. If they’re more straightforward and to the point then follow suit.

 

Lack of enthusiasm

You might by nature be on the quiet side, but it is imperative that you convey your enthusiasm for the job and the company you’re interviewing with. That enthusiasm will come through in your tone of voice and your words. And at the end of the interview when you specifically ask for the job. As obvious as your interest may seem, given that you are sitting there interviewing for the job, it’s important of actually ask for the job. Something along the lines of, “It was a great pleasure meeting you. Given our discussion, I believe I can be a great asset to the company. I look forward to hearing back from you.”

Gain Confidence Through Experience

Gain confidence through experience

There are people who choose to do a thing then systematically go about doing everything they need to gain the experience to get the thing done.

Learn by doing

My daughter is an example of a doer. When she was thirteen years old she decided she wanted to animate one of her favorite books on YouTube. She was a good artist, but not great by any means. She didn’t let that deter her. In the beginning she got friends and family to do the voices for her and she spent all her free time drawing. She learned how to animate by doing it and by watching how-to videos other people posted.

Gain confidence through experience

With each episode she released she got better and better. Gradually her subscribers increased. 100, 1,000, 10,000. Once she finished animating that book she decided to write her own series. By the time she got out of high school she had over 65,000 subscribers and millions of views. She was a YouTube celebrity. She was (and is) also an outstanding artist, animator and writer.

There were people who asked her why she spent so much time on her project. Who told her she would never be successful at it. Who questioned the point– since it didn’t make her any money.  She heard them, but didn’t pay any attention.

More important than ignoring the voices of people around her, my daughter was able to ignore her own inner voice. The one that said all the same things other people were saying, but in her head. Louder and more consistently.

Don’t listen

The voice in our head that says you can’t is your greatest enemy. It’s an immobilizer. Think of the great art was never created because of it. The books not written. All the people who missed the opportunity to lead, to invent, to sing their songs because of it?

Even if it’s impossible to silent that voice, you certainly don’t have to listen. If you want to paint, then paint. Even if you aren’t great at it, through practice you will get better. Even if you only ever get slightly less than terrible, you did it and the hours doing it brought you joy.

There are voices in your head and voices in your heart. It’s your life. You get to choose which one you listen to.

Help Others Cultivate Their Potential

Help Others Cultivate Their Potential

How do your favorite people treat you?

Think about your favorite teacher in school. If you’ve had a boss you really enjoyed, think about them for a moment. Do you remember what you liked about them? Were they kind, or friendly? Did they treat you as not just a student or employee but someone who could be trusted and shared with? Did they treat you as you could be, rather than what you were? Was your potential cultivated?

 

Acknowledge potential

In his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen R. Covey points out how one person can have a tremendous effect on others. Most of us have been in a position where we felt like we didn’t have much wiggle room in our work or assignments. For the most part our teachers have treated us like students. This doesn’t sound so bad, they’re there to teach. But what if, instead of treating you like a student or an employee, your teacher or boss treated you like someone who could run the company some day?

 

Create confidence

That could be by offering you more responsibility and bigger tasks. Tasks that you can handle and excel at, that will enable you to grow your role. You’ll feel more respected and important, and in turn you’ll start acting with more confidence in your work.

 

This isn’t just for people who have others working under them either. You can do this for your coworkers as well. Treat your coworkers as people who can both help you and bring new ideas to the table, rather than just people you work with. You may find that they’ll go out of their way to help you in the future.

What Does Your Self Image Say About You?

What Does Your Self Image Say About You?

You may put tons of attention into what you wear every day and what you say, but if you don’t have a strong, defined self-image all of that exterior stuff will ultimately come to naught. It’s vitally important that each and every one of us recognizes the value of our self-image.  The way you see yourself on the inside will make a huge impact on how you behave and talk to others on the outside.

 

The good news is, even if you don’t already have a strong self-image, you can absolutely update it! For instance, top sales people don’t see themselves as sales people, they see themselves as consultants, or problem solvers for the people they’re speaking to. By changing your perception of yourself, you can change the perception others have of you. Leaders and managers see themselves as people deserving of the trust and attention of others.

 

In an article about self image and business success from Forbes, they recommend two things to increase self image. First, be your own best fan. Don’t wait for someone else to tell you you’re great. Tell yourself!

 

Second, invest in your own competence. If you don’t feel qualified for what you’re doing, then change that. The surer you are about your abilities the more self confident you will feel.

 

How you see yourself is how others will see you

 

You may not realize this, but people will perceive how you feel about yourself and follow your lead. Whatever you believe about yourself is what others will also believe about you. If you see yourself as a capable person, striving to get one thing done after another, that’s how people will perceive you.

 

If you see yourself as a problem solver or a consultant specializing in a particular area, then that is how you will be perceived by the people you speak to.

 

See yourself in your best light and watch it shine on others.

Successful Sales People All Have This in Common

Successful Sales People All Have This in Common

 

Here’s a quiz: What’s the greatest indicator of success for a sales person?:

 

  1. Product knowledge
  2. Sales skills
  3. Irresistibility of the product
  4. Personality of the salesperson

 

Answer:

  1. Personality of the salesperson

 

In the hands of a self-confident sales person, a mediocre product will completely outsell an outstanding product in the hands of a less confident sales person.

 

The good news is, even if you are not a confident person by natural disposition, with a little work and perseverance you can build your confidence levels up. It all starts with how you treat yourself when no one else is listening.

 

How do you talk to yourself? Are you negative and harsh or are you positive and encouraging? The most important voice you’re going to hear day in and day out in your life is your own. It’s the loudest, most pervasive, persuasive voice of all.

 

Self confident people like and respect themselves. If they catch themselves letting negative self defeating thoughts in they don’t just try and turn the thoughts around, they take charge. What’s the negative self talk about? What can I do to change the situation that brought it about?

 

The more confident you feel about yourself the more confidence you’ll have in your face to face interactions. If you’re less confident, you’re not going to be motivated to put yourself into situations where there’s a chance of failure.

 

The more you like yourself, the more others like you. The more you like other people the more confidence they’ll have in you and what you’re selling.

 

Your self confidence spills over into the product you’re promoting. When you believe in your product as much as you believe in yourself, people you’re talking to will be inclined to believe in it right along with you. Remember, your customers are taking their cues from you. Because you’re confident, they’re confident. Because you’re enthusiastic, they’re enthusiastic.

 

Confident people will always take full responsibility for their results. They don’t think of themselves as working for someone else or on behalf of someone else. They think of themselves as being self employed because they realize the level of success they’re going to have starts and ends with them. When things aren’t going the way they hope they don’t stand around complaining or waiting for someone to step in and fix things, they take charge. They change what they can and seek out the help they need to change what they can’t.

 

Not only are self confident people inspired and inspiring, instead of wasting time worrying about failure, they think about the next thing they can try to achieve success.